My Leap List

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Grandma Hippo

“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could.” 
     I have a negative voice that loves to come out at night and replay all of the imperfect things I did or said during the day.  Most people can reflect, learn from the experience and let it go.  I belittle myself until I am ashamed.  One of the remnants of my past that I'm still unlearning.
     I love Pig in Pearls Before Swine because he reminds me of myself.  I read this comic last year during a difficult time, and I cut it out to put on my fridge.  It's yellowed with age now, but when I see it every day I smile.  
     In the strip from the day before, Pig said the hippo reminded him of his grandma, so I started calling her "Grandma Hippo."  I told my daughter, "I wish I had a Grandma Hippo to hug me when life gets hard."  It became a code word in our secret language for needing extra love and hugs.
     My daughter surprised me with a Grandma Hippo for my birthday.  She sits by my bed.  Usually I don't notice she is there, but when life gets too hard and the voice in my head gets too loud, I pull her down and hold her.  
     In those moments I am reassured that the day is done and I have done everything I can.  I smile, the voice fades, and I sleep as contentedly as Pig sleeps in Grandma Hippo's arms.  
  

4 comments:

  1. What a touching and honest post. I love the spirit of sweet vulnerability displayed in your words.

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  2. Thanks, Rich! That means a lot to me!

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  3. Tiff, this is such a heart-warming post. I love your Hippo! I understand how hard it can be to stop that negative voice. I was doing it in group this past Tuesday. The therapist said 'Do not be resistant to the changes you have made'. She said that we all slip into resistance while we are growing and said it is okay, but try to recognize it and not let it 'settle in'. Anyway, I just wanted to share this with you. NO ONE IS PERFECT! We were not made to be perfect. You just need to be you and the rest will follow. Take care!

    Peace, Nico

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  4. "Pearls" in delightfully punny and mean spirited but Pig is the eternal innocent. No wonder you find this strip so touching. It really is, Tiff.

    Namaste.
    Rich

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