As a recovering perfectionist, I am following the wise advice of Doctor Marvin in my favorite movie What About Bob? and taking baby steps to letting go.
Baby Step #1 - Stop Saying Yes
Yesterday my friend Renae reminded me that not saying yes is not the same as saying no. She is so right. It is my first baby step. I have a 30+ year habit of saying yes to everything and then feeling resentful at the people who asked me. For the past ten days I have not said yes to any new commitments, including volunteering for any new jobs or responsibilities. I
Baby Step #2- Let Go of the Negative Self-Talk
My poor soul listens to all kinds of trash talk that I wouldn't let anyone else ever say to me. It is unconscious, but now when I hear it, I stop it. I'm doing pretty good, except when I catch my reflection. For now I'm avoiding mirrors as much as possible until I have mastered this baby step a little more.
Baby Step #3 - Let Go of the Weight
I have plenty of excuses about my weight - some valid and some are just excuses - but the results are still the same. I am letting go of the weight by jogging in my virtual shower cap, eating better, walking around as much as I can at work, and then letting my energy focus on all the other great things in my life, rather than obsessing on my weight.
Baby Step #4 - Say Yes to Me
Like many working parents, the only times I make an appearance on my to-do list is when I need to do an errand like go to the dentist to fix my tooth. By saying yes to everyone else, there is never time for me. I have spent years waiting to finish this infinite to-do list so I can finally do all the things I want to do. It is time to say yes to myself and spend time doing the things I love.